05/21/92 – 12/01/09


Rest in peace Marissa… We will always remember you.

It is always very sad when someone dies.  At times we need help to get through these sad moments.  If you know someone who needs to talk to a counselor, please let them know that there is help available.  All of the counselors and staff at Ripon High can let you know how to contact a counselor on campus or you can call Valley Community Counseling Services in Manteca at (209) 239-5553 to get help for yourself or a friend.

– David D. Love, MFT
Therapist at Valley
Community Counseling Services


Share your thoughts and memories by filling out the comment form at the bottom of the page.
Leave a Reply to Kaitlyn Williams

  1. kaitlyn says:

    i miss you babygurl. still think about u all the time. wish you were here still.

  2. Raevyn says:

    I think about your beautiful face everyday <3 the crew from lovefest is lighting candles for you this weekend we will never forget you .

  3. Kamie Goforth says:

    a year ago today we had a talk where you promised me that you would never take your own life away. im sitting here jus replaying that convo over and over again. i wish you would have stuck to your promise and you could be here with me and kaitlyn. i miss you like crazyy and unfortunately its still not getting any easier :( i hope your watching over us. i love you

  4. cassie hoogendoorn says:

    i cant stop thinking about you, its getting closer and closer to a year i wish i could have helped you i miss you. i love you. please watch over your family and also kamie and kaitlyn. love you.

  5. Kevin Ton says:

    Hey Marissa, just thinking of you.. :)

  6. Unknown says:


    We love you.
    Hope your having fun. :)

    I know your watching down on us.
    Love You Foreverr. <33

  7. April Wright says:

    As crazy as it sounds, I still don’t believe it because I don’t want to believe it. I miss you, I miss your smiling face and that laugh of yours. When I saw a little girl that looked exactly like you at work, I knew you were telling me everything will be okay. I love you riss.

  8. beckah says:

    miss you marissa.

  9. Kamie Goforth says:

    Marissa i honestly believed that you saved my life tonight and were watching over me. thank you girlie. i love you :)

  10. caitlin gabrielson says:

    Marissa!! girl i miss you!! i hope you are smiling down on all of us(: your in my prayers and thoughts just as i am sure you are in everyone elses…your spirit goes with us in our college memories. i love you girl forever and ever(:

  11. katie says:

    Marissa, i really miss you girlie. i wish you were here right now to talk to about all the ish that is going on. I really need someone who understands and who i can trust. not a day goes by that i dont still ask myself why you broke ur promise. i keep thinking back to a year ago when we were all still in shock over dillon. a year ago i would have never have thought we would lose you too. i wish we could go back to before all the pain started. i miss you like crazy girlie. i know you are still here with all of us. the unexplainable events such as people walking away from their car accidents without major injuries just proves that you are watching over us. i love ya girlie. i’m always telling people what an amazing girl and friend you were. stay close and keep watching over us. :)

  12. Kaitlyn Williams says:

    I miss u so much…. :[

  13. Cassie Muller says:

    Miss you. :/

  14. Tyler white says:

    Wow, i havent written on here in a while. But its getting closer and closer to one whole year. A whole year that all of us have been living here without you. I miss you so much…i was remembering fun times we used to have in leadership. I miss you so much marissa and i think about you all the time. We all love you. I love you tons amd
    I cant wait to see you again.

  15. Girl From Modesto says:

    I miss you a lot, and it keeps getting closer and closer to a year. I just keep realizing that your gone, I cannot even begin to imagine what your family and close friends have had to go through. I keep looking at your pictures and it doesn’t seem real. Keep watching over us (:

  16. Kamie Goforth says:

    i really miss you. i wish you were here with me right now. or we were making plans on seeing eachother. its almost a year and i cant even imagine how i have been able to make it this far without you. i love you girl and hope you will visit me soon please

  17. Rachel Xavier says:

    hey ris i havent been on here in a long time…I have been thinking about you ALOT lately..and every time i do i start crying.it is going to be a year this wednesday that you have been gone.it still doesnt seem real.i miss you so much…please watch over all of us and try and help us get thru wednesday…it is going to be a hard day
    I LOVE YOU!!!

  18. caitlin gabrielson says:

    i love you marissa(:

  19. Jesika says:

    Well Marissa it was one year ago today that I would ever talk to you for the last time. It was the last day I ever got to hear you laugh behind me in Spanish class. I remember it was the same day you were wearing that black and white skirt over your pants. It was the last time i ever laughed at you for just being random. I was never you best friend. But you leaving us so soon has impacted my life. Tomorrow will be a year already and I can not believe it.I will forever miss you. Watch over everyone. Love you! Jesika (your least favorite couple (:

  20. CassieTod says:

    It has already been a year today. I love you so much, I miss you…
    Time has gone by so fast. I can’t believe it has already been a year!
    I don’t even know what to say.. :(
    I miss you….


  21. britt says:

    Marissa, I can’t believe its already been a year!! As the days go by, you are never forgotten, but loved & missed so much more!! See you soon riss! Love you!!

  22. caitlin gabrielson says:

    Hey girl, so i read jesika’s comment and i totally remember you wearing your skirt over your pants(: gahh, that was also the day i finally figured out the key players in the love square. I still have the entire diagram you drew on the back of my spanish notebook…So Confusing!!! ha i was also sitting in my calc class doing derivatives cuz i failed so terribly last year and i thought about the names we came up for kids, we had absolutely nothing better to do. and ap bio, yuckkk ban of our existence.lol well i love you and drink it up for me baby doll!! keep an eye out for me kk? miss you girl, i’ll be seeing you again(: LOVE YOU FOREVER!

  23. tyler white says:

    i can’t believe it has already been a whole year. it definitely doesnt seem like it has been that long without you. it is so hard not having you hear with us all. but i know you are watching over us and making sure we are all okay :) i love you Marissa, and i can’t wait to see you again!

  24. Marissa's Dad says:

    I don’t visit this blog often anymore. I’ve witnessed too much hatred spewed here. Marissa would not appreciate it. How dare you attack those closest to my daughter? Also, I’m curious as to why you stopped there. Seems to me those responsible for her well being would first be her parents. Maybe you didn’t do your homework well enough. I saw my daughter last. I found her. I fully acknowledge my part in her decision. I will forever regret that I let this happen. I do hope that you find peace with my daughter’s passing. Now, if you have any more hatred to spew, please do it some place other than a blog created for people to come remember my daughter. Thanks, Robert McLeod you can reach my at 209-380-5035 or on Facebook.

    • Marissa's Dad says:

      *me–thank you to whoever removed the comment I had been referring to, as well as everyone else for the kind words and memories. Thank you all for being a part of my daughter’s life.

  25. Kamie Goforth says:

    wow seriously. just because you dont write on a website every single day does not mean that we are not thinking about marissa. first off before you start talking smack on a MEMORIAL website get your facts straight. if you have a problem say it to our faces dont go around posting on something that is supposed to be happy and for us people who actually care about marissa to leave comments on here. you need to take you and your words somewhere else. this website isnt ment for you! i was coming on her to leave a comment to say merry christmas and this is what i have to see. you should really be ashamed of yourself and ihope that you are. dont leave something like this again it is greatly appreciated! if you really knew marissa you would know that she hated drama!!! so stop starting it

    marissa i love you and have a merry christmas.

  26. Hannah Nelson says:

    I can say that i havent been on this site since Marissa died. That doesnt mean that i dont think about Marissa. Who ever a true rhs friend is, you have no idea how much Kamie and Kaitlyn miss and talk about Marissa on a daily basis. You truly are the shit person to come on a memorial website and tell her closest friends that they dont care. There are way more productive things to do, like maybe writing something nice. I do believe that is something that Marissa would have loved. Marissa took her own life and there is no one to blame for that. So get a life and worry about yourself. Merry Christmas Bitch. :)

  27. Paulina ceja says:

    Please whoever you are..stop. You are causing so much animosity and anger, for what? There really is no point in it and I know for a fact that everyone loves marissa and will never forget her..whether they post it everyday has nothing to do with them not missing her. Maybe they just don’t feel like telling everyone. I’m asking you just please stop causing all this drama because I’m trying to remember my friend on this page not see innocent people being blamed for her passing.rissa I love you so much and I miss you everyday, I know your watching over me and I’m gonna go and be that successful person that you always told me I could be.merry Christmas boo.<3<3

  28. Kaitlyn Williams says:

    Merry Xmas Hoe.:]

  29. Karena Stephens says:

    i have no idea who “true rhs friend” is but for my dad passing away a few years ago, and me not posting on his myspace everyday, doesnt mean i dont love him. he was my best friend just like marissa was best friends with kamie and kaitlyn. They also have a life, a life that they are enjoying. and for marissa up above, she is enjoying watching her friends enjoy the life they have. People dont have to mourn everyday. They would like to let marissa rest peacefully in paradise.

  30. Kamie Goforth says:

    hope you party it up tonight girll :)) another new year with out you it definately wont be the samee. love ya girll

  31. Cassie Muller says:

    Miss you soooo much and I love you!
    The new year won’t be the same without you that’s for sure…
    <3 <3

  32. Nicole says:

    I was cleaning out some of my things yesterday because I’m moving and I found this box I had made senior year. I found a picture of Marissa and just started to cry. I started to think about my life and how its beginning and I started to think of how hers ended so quickly and too soon.I thought i wish she was doing the same thing I wish I could see her getting ready to go back to school or just to see her on the street.I know I wasn’t the best of friends with her but I felt like if their was anything I could do to bring her back in that very moment I would do it. she was beautiful inside and out and so many people loved her. I just wanted to tell u I love u I was thinking about u Marissa. let your beauty shine wherever you are.

  33. Kamie Goforth says:

    Love you baby girl.

  34. Lindsay says:

    Miss you marissa. =( all our talks. i wish i could have helped you and you still could be here with us

  35. Cassie Muller says:

    Hi Rissa :)
    Just stopping by to say hello and imy <3
    Love you!

  36. jackie says:

    ive been thinking about you alot lately marissa. we all miss you. RIP pretty girl. <3

  37. Cassie Muller says:

    Today is the first again already :(
    Time flies by… but there isn’t a day where I don’t think of you.
    Love and miss you.

  38. dee says:

    heyy just checkin in, my birthday past again last monday. wished you were around just for a quick phone call to say happy bday. your mom is doing a great job with marissas closet, she has been a big help with the girls in our community with the dresses. you and your mom both are an inspiration. muaahh love you girl, R.I.P.

  39. Danielle Kneller says:

    i know its been a while but i miss you so much more and more everyday if thats even mentally/physically possible. i find myself reminising on all our good times i know ur watching over all of us and keeping us safe i love you bby grl and miss you very much

  40. flying with your wings says:

    “She’s Beautiful in her simple little way, She doesnt have too much to say when she gets mad, She understands she dont let go of anything, Even when the pain gets really bad, guess i should’ve been more like that. you had it all for a pretty little while, and some how you made me smile when i was sad. You took a chance on your bruised and beaten heart, then you realized you wanted what you had. i guess i shouldve been more like that.” i love you and miss you ever day!♥

  41. flying with your wings says:

    She’s beautiful in her simple little way
    She don’t have too much to say when she gets mad
    “She understands she don’t let go of anything
    Even when the pain gets really bad
    I guess I should’ve been more like that

    You had it all for a pretty little while
    And some how you made me smile when I was sad
    You took a chance on a bruised and beaten heart
    And then you realized you wanted what you had
    I guess I should’ve been more like that”

    im missing you every day Marissa. i love you

  42. Kaitlyn Williams says:

    I love you

  43. Caitlin says:

    hey beautiful girl
    happy birthday<3

  44. Kaitlyn Williams says:

    its been way to long ….I cant help but to continue mourning over such a huge loss. I love you

  45. tyler white says:

    Love and miss you marissa! <3

  46. unknown says:

    i didn’t know you well, you worked with my mom and sister. even though i didn’t know you like everyone else, i still cried my eyes out when i found out you were gone. i still cry. i don’t know why such a beautiful girl would do such a thing, but as long as you’re in a better place. i just wanted to know that i miss you marissa, with all my heart. </3

  47. So I discovered today that I was related to you.. I wish I could’ve met you and such but yeah.. I read the about you on the closet site.. and when I read it I seen a spitting image of myself.. like you are a twin of me… I miss you… This year in basketball… Im going to win every game for you Marissa…. #23 Kyle Blue Mercado… and im going to win the district championship in your name and You inspired me fam… love yah… Hope to see you soon sometime when it is my time. <3

    -Kyle Blue Mercado
    #23 DSA Raptors.

  48. unknown says:

    I miss you Marissa! <3

  49. Sarah Carpenetti says:

    Marissa–just heard about this by seeing it on an old friend’s facebook page. It has been a while but I very clearly remember you being my desk buddy at colony oak elementary school in mrs. newburg’s class. You were a fun lively girl…I havent seen you since then, but my thoughts are with you and with your family <3

    With much love & memories in mind–

  50. paulina ceja says:

    So I was doing some leadership things today and it reminded me of the times when we would sit there for dayyyss making those damn potty presses and all you used to do was complain about certain people haha and how they wer such “slackers”. It made my day so much brighter, just knowing I would see you and your stories would make me laugh. No matter how bad of a day I was having you would always say something to make me laugh. I’m making you proud over here in sonoma, I know your watching over me. I love you marissa.

  51. Ali Azevedo says:

    I still feel like you are going to come back sometimes. you missed so much school it wasn’t unusual to not see you for long periods of time, but this is too long. You were in my dream a couple nights ago! the weird part was once I saw you I didn’t understand because I knew you were gone. You had a huge smile on your face as you greeted me and hugged me so hard I couldn’t breathe. best dream I have had in a longg time. It was brief but it felt so real! please make it happen again :) I love and miss you so much!

  52. unknown says:


    I love you

    that’s all


  53. unknown says:

    One more of my friends passed away today so naturally I am thinking of you too. It’s the night before thanksgiving but it feels hard to be thankful right about now I love and miss you and wish you a Happy Thanksgiving <3

  54. tyler white says:

    It’s almost been two years…doesn’t seem like its been this long. So crazy how fast the time goes. I’m always thinking of you, I know youre watching over all of us! Love and miss you so much <3

  55. Ali Azevedo says:

    Marissa, it has been too long, I cannot believe it has been two years already. I still remember you vividly and believe it or not I actually miss your long over exaggerated detailed stories that you took an hour to tell. creative writing and cheer are some of the best memories I have with you. I wish we could sesh and eat too much panda again haha I hope you are okay and happy wherever you are. Love and miss you so much! Rest In Peace love!

  56. Jackie says:

    I think about you SO much lately. It still blows my mind.. Today I thought I saw you at the mall, I had to take a second look and then it all hit me all over again like the very first day. I know your busy up there but do you think once in awhile you could visit in a dream? Even if it’s brief… I’d just like to see your smile. <3

  57. Bree says:

    you are missed everyday! you are heavy on my heart & mind everyday! your memory lives in our hearts.. you will NEVER be forgotten Marissa!

  58. unknown says:

    Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
    I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
    I feel you everywhere I go.
    I see your smile, I see your face,
    I hear you laughin’ in the rain.
    I still can’t believe you’re gone.

    It ain’t fair: you died too young,
    Like the story that had just begun,
    But death tore the pages all away.
    God knows how I miss you,
    All the hell that I’ve been through,
    Just knowin’ no-one could take your place.
    An’ sometimes I wonder,
    Who’d you be today?

    Would you see the world? Would you chase your dreams?
    Settle down with a family,
    I wonder what would you name your babies?
    Some days the sky’s so blue,
    I feel like I can talk to you,
    An’ I know it might sound crazy.

    It ain’t fair: you died too young,
    Like the story that had just begun,
    But death tore the pages all away.
    God knows how I miss you,
    All the hell that I’ve been through,
    Just knowin’ no-one could take your place.
    An’ sometimes I wonder,
    Who you’d be today?

    Today, today, today.
    Today, today, today.

    Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
    I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
    The only thing that gives me hope,
    Is I know I’ll see you again some day.

    Some day, some day, some day.

  59. Ali Azevedo says:

    I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you more than words can say!

  60. Jackie says:


  61. heaven says:

    wat happened to her? </3

  62. Ali says:

    Someone just posted a picture of you in heels that are clearly too big, you look 8 or 9. One of the last times I saw you, you were wearing those damn stilettos. Always rockin heels through the halls I never understood how you wore those all day! It made me think of you and how much I miss you! I can still hear your laugh as long as that doesn’t change ill feel you with me love and miss you girl think about you all the time!

  63. Ali Azevedo says:

    Happy Birthday Beautiful! I wish I could see your face or hear one of your crazy stories again just one more time…this weekend was hard relay for life and your birthday, that’s a whole lot of crying for one weekend. I hope you are at peace dancing around in heaven. I love you so much and miss you with all my heart. come visit me in my dreams sweet girl love love love

  64. Danielle says:

    Marissa I miss and love you I think of u everyday and even though you have been gone for almost three years now I still have all our memories you were my best friend and I will never let you go I miss you :(

  65. Ali says:

    I miss you sweet girl.

  66. Jackie says:

    Thinking of youuu.

  67. Jackie says:

    still dont get it

  68. annonymous says:

    Its been 3 years today and I remember when I found out I thought they were lying and I even called my best friend to confirm that it wasn’t you, but I was wrong and I wished I could take back what I had just heard. I was in complete and utter shock. I haven’t really talked about how sad it truly makes me that you did this to yourself. I didn’t get to know to you as well as wish I could have. I think that’s why I try to act like it doesn’t bother me because we weren’t super close, so I feel that im not allowed to be sad. I was a part of your family and we even shared a room. But I didn’t get to know you personally like I would have liked to. I loved you because

    e you were my sister and I wonder if I would have stayed maybe I could’ve helped you,I tried to commit suicide to, but im still here and your gone. I think to myself maybe I could’ve said something to you to make you change your mind, maybe I would have been there that day and you wouldn’t have been alone. It eats me up in side and I see what its done to your family. I wish you were still here, your family misses you so much, I cry because I miss you to. I love you Marissa.

  69. Anonymous says:

    I hope you had a great 21st bday up there marissa.. I made sure mine was great just for you! Wish we would have gotten the chance to celebrate them together. Just wanted you to know I’ve been thinking about you.. I miss you Marissa. YOU WILL NEVER BE FORGOTTEN. Watch over us please. Goodnight angel.

  70. Des says:

    You’re still on our minds and in our thoughts.

  71. Kaitlyn says:

    I have never stopped thinking of you. You have changed my whole life …. My whole way of thinking .. Everything. I am so grateful to have known you. I love you sooo much best friend.

  72. Cassie says:

    Still can’t believe it is the first of the month already. Missing your contagious smile!

  73. Danielle says:

    I miss you…

  74. Kaitlyn says:

    I love you xo.

  75. Kaitlyn says:

    I wish you were here now more then anything, I miss you so much it hurts.

  76. T says:

    I was just was hit with a wave of missing you …. I rember the day my mother told me i just got back from my dads witch you and your friend K where the first people i told about him and you soothed me but she told me while holding back tears then i called becs to make sure and she confirmed it and i just went numb i will never forget that day…

  77. Cm says:

    I miss you. I wish you could have stayed a little longer so I could continue to watch you grow into someone I looked up to. But I know that’s selfish of me, and I find a little peace knowing you are somewhere where your pain cannot reach you. You were such a treasure. So beautiful, so smart, such a kind soul.. I wish I was more like you marissa, because although you lived a short life, you became everything I could have ever hoped to be as a person in just those 17 years. I wish everyone could be like you. I wish I could be like you. The darkness is consuming and I wish it took me instead of you. Rest easy. Xoxo

  78. Cm says:

    Me again. 9 hours later and you’ve already crossed my mind again. I think I’m going to start talking you before bed again, because I’ve honestly never felt so lost in my goddamn life, and the only other person I can talk to doesn’t want to talk to me. Wish you were here.

  79. Cm says:

    it all fucking hurts. i want to come see you.

  80. Cm says:

    You’re the only person I can talk to right now marissa. I need somebody to be there for me terribly right now, and you’re all I have left even though you’re not really here.. A candle won’t cut it tonight, I’ll feel better typing this out to you since it’s anonymous on here anyways. I’m tired. I’m tired of fighting with the one I love the most when all I want to do is love them endlessly. I’m tired of crying when all I want is to smile with one person. I’m tired of not feeling good enough to be happy. Is that how you felt too..? Even if it’s my own fault, it’s a shitty feeling nonetheless.. I want to be happy and I want that person to be happy and I want us to be happy together. I just don’t know why I have to be a shitty fucking person no matter how bad I try to be different. I don’t need anyone to feel bad for me about it. I just need someone to listen. I really wish you were here to listen. I hope all is well wherever it is you are… Xoxo.

  81. Danielle Kneller says:

    Hey baby love,

    I have to write a speech for college on a sensitive subject and I’m hoping you could be there when I give it because damn it’s going to take my all to hold my shit together… I know if you were here today you’d tell me to suck it up and do my thing but you’re not and I can’t so please girlie anything you can do…. I miss you and just know you’ve been on my mind not only because of this but because I just miss you every damn day.
    I love you Marissa

  82. Cassie says:

    There is not a day that goes by that I don’t think of you. Love and miss you more and more each day that passes. Until we meet again. Forever in my heart.

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